Man Down! We Have a Fainter

After nine years you'd think I've seen it all.  Well, you'd be right.  Some things I don't really want to add to my list of experiences.  Like wedding crashers, rain and fainting groomsmen.  Yes, fainting groomsmen.

As a proud former band geek, I know the cardinal rule of 'NEVER LOCK YOUR KNEES WHEN STANDING FOR LONG PERIODS OF TIME.'  Ever see those funny videos of the band member holding the tuba go crashing to the ground?  Locked knees.  At the rehearsal, I make sure to point this out to the party.  In fact, at this wedding rehearsal I said:  "Make sure to not lock your knees and drink plenty of water.  If you faint, I will blog about it and put it on YouTube."  ;-)  Well I was only joking, but you're reading this blog, so I think you know where this is going.

Paso Robles is HOT!!! This day it was just over 100 degrees.  I've lived here for over 10 years now and believe it or not, I can handle the heat.  You have to when 90% of  your wedding are outside.  I had gotten the bride down the aisle and was about to update my facebook status (you know me)  ;-) when I heard:  "Water! Water!"  I look up in time to see a groomsman wobbling in the heat.  We had cold water right there but it wasn't enough.  He went down.  Another groomsman caught him.  I ran down the aisle grabbed a chair from the front row and got it under him just when he was really going down.  He was a big guy and we couldn't hold him.  I got a parasol and got him in the shade.  Guests were attending to him so I thought I'd check on the bride.  She told me she thought SHE was going to faint.  Off I ran for more water and a parasol for her.  After about 15 minutes, the ceremony continued.  All of the groomsmen held parasols for the rest of the wedding so their friend would be in the shade.

Advice for anyone involved in a wedding:

Drink water, drink water, drink water!  Eat, eat, eat!  Oh and of course, DON'T LOCK YOUR KNEES!  ;-)

For a laugh...

Ask A Planner: Vendor Meals

Hello Wed Heads!!!  The following is a question that has been asked of me many times by brides, grooms, wedding professionals and facebook fans:  "What about vendor meals?"

Great question!  I take pride in making sure that all of the vendors at my weddings are well taken care of and happy!  I make sure they have food, water, sodas, sun screen, anything they need during the wedding.  Unfortunately, I think only about 10% of couples hire wedding planners.  So here is my advice.  ;-)

Brides and Grooms:  

Make sure to ORDER meals for the vendors that will be on site for an extended period of time on your wedding day.  This would be, but not limited to, planners, photographers, videographers, DJs, bar staff, site staff and band/musicians.  Make sure to find out if they have assistants.  Almost no one comes alone to work a wedding.  Do not add these people to your guest count for your caterer.  Let the caterer know a separate count for your vendor meals.  The reason, caterers may charge you a reduced rate for wedding vendor meals.  Most importantly it alerts their staff that they will need to serve your vendors and that your vendors' meals have been paid for. 

Plan ahead as to WHERE your vendors can eat.  Most of us like to eat somewhere close by, but somewhere we can be unseen.  Although some photographers like to eat where they can see the bride and groom so they can jump up and get a shot if they need to.  Ask your venue if they have a location especially for your vendors to eat, ask your vendor if they have a preferred location to eat at the venue.  

Do not serve your vendors a meal that differs from your guest's meals.  Quite frankly, we don't like this and find it insulting.  Your wedding vendors are working tremendously hard to give you your special day, treat them like an honored guest and they will treat you like a cherished friend.  No boxed lunches please.

Plan on WHEN your vendors can eat.  I have vendors eat at different times.  For example, I always have the photographers and videographers eat as close to the time as the bride and groom.  Photographers love this because they are done eating by the time the couple is and can get back to capturing the moment.  I have had a photographer tell me she was yelled at by a site manager for eating before all of the guests had.  A good reason to have a table somewhere close to the action but behind the scenes for your vendors.  Also a good reason to explain your method to the caterer ahead of time.  If your photographer all of a sudden tries to get food before some of the guests, the catering staff could be totally thrown.  If it is all planned out ahead of time, they will know when to serve the paparazzi.  ;-) 

Wedding Professionals:

May I suggest addressing your meal in your contract or at least simply bringing it to your bride's attention that yourself and your assistant will be needing a meal.  You would be surprised how many brides hire me for 'day of' wedding coordination and haven't even thought about vendor meals until I come on the scene.  They will appreciate being alerted ahead of time.  Caterers, please make it a point to ask brides and grooms about their vendors.  Do not assume they will know to add them.  

Hope this helps!  Thanks for submitting all of your questions on my facebook page.  Have a question you need answered?  Want to 'Ask A Planner?'  Leave a comment, I'd love to help.  ;-)

Ask A Planner: Invitations

Yesterday I asked for questions from my facebook fans and I got a ton of them!  Thanks Guys!

First up is Nicky who wanted to know if it is too late to send invitations out for her September wedding.  Etiquette says that you should send out wedding invitations 6 - 8 weeks before the wedding.  Nicky was very smart to send her guests a 'save the date,' so they won't be caught off guard.  That being said, they are surely waiting for the formal invitation with all of the wedding information.  It's never too late to send wedding invitations, don't wait another day.  I once put a wedding together in 24 hours.  Someone called all of the guests and invited them for the next day.  You know what, all but one person made it.  ;-)  Hopefully you are having a local wedding with guests not having to make travel arrangements.  If you do have guests traveling, I would go ahead and call them today to help with hotel accommodations, etc...

Nicky, make sure to post a picture of your wedding on my facebook page, congratulations and good luck!!

Stay tuned for tomorrow when I answer Samantha's question, how do you announce that you are not taking your husband's last name?

Photo by Cameron Ingalls

Vendor Spotlight ~ Say It In The Sand

I'd like to introduce you to a unique business, Say It In The Sand.  The name says it all.  I believe the owner, Amy Fordyce, just wanted an excuse to work at the beach every day.  Well who can blame her?!   ;-)  Amy lives on the beautiful Central Coast of California, the perfect place for a business like Say It In The Sand.

Check out the beautiful sign Amy made for my business.

Believe it or not, this idea came to Amy in a dream one night, as she imagined the beach as her own personal Etch A Sketch.  The business immediately took off upon opening in January of 2010.

You may think that these are simply made in photoshop.  Wrong!  Amy makes every sign by hand. Her canvas is the sand and her clear nemesis the ocean.  She must have to work fast before it washes away her creation.  Her favorite beaches to work at are Grover, Pismo and Avila.  So keep an eye out for her next time you are strolling on the beach.

Amy can create just about anything you want.  Wedding invitations, greeting cards, thank you notes, inspirational calendars, save the dates, baby names and stats, business names, personal messages, your imagination is the limit.

You can place an order with Amy on her facebook page, or by emailing her.  Amy's 'sand o grams' are only $10 for a 5 x 7 and $20 for a 8 x 10.  (Add $5 for a frame.)

Do you know a unique wedding business that I need to spotlight?  Email me, I'd love to hear about them!

Hello, Bride? It's Me, Nature

I just watched the wedding episode of 'Bethenny Getting Married?'   Aside from the beautiful wedding, the part that struck me the most was when Bethenny peed in a silver ice bucket before her ceremony.  Yes I'm serious.  Turns out, Bethenny would have had to walk through all of her guests to get to the restroom.  Oh and did I mention that she was seven months pregnant?  ;-)  Enter the bucket.  Let me tell you, the wedding planner and her assistant held the bucket.  THAT is commitment!

You are probably thinking, oh Sarah, that has never happened to you.  Well you would be wrong.  A different reason, but yes, I had a bride who wore a very stunning and very hard to get into mermaid style wedding gown.  It apparently took her over a half hour to get into the dress.  Well halfway into the reception, nature called.  Her maid of honor came up to me, explained the issue and asked me for a bucket.  She continued to say, "Don't worry, I'll empty the bucket."  I thought, no kidding!

In the end, the bride decided to take the time to get out of the dress.  Much to my happiness.  I really didn't want to have to tell her no, and I really didn't want to hold the bucket.  ;-)

What is going on ladies?  A quick google search of 'bridal diapers' came up with a litany of postings.  For example this post on Marie Claire.  This hit the viral air waves in June and got everybody talking.  It's legit.  People are selling 'bridal diapers.'  Really?  If the dress is that perfect, you'll be able to get in and out of it without a crane.  Ladies, please don't forget it's your day.  Really, we'll wait for you!  Nothing will happen without you.  Feel free to take as much time as you like in the restroom.  Seriously, nix the bucket and diapers.

What to you all think about this?  Have you ever heard of such a thing?

Wedding Planner : On Site Manager ~ The Difference

It seems there is a lot of confusion, by some, as to the difference between a wedding planner and an on site manager.  (Notice I didn't say on site coordinator, as I find this title misleading.)  Before I begin this post I would like to say that I mean no disrespect to any of the very hard working site managers that are out there.  Especially the ones I have had the pleasure to work with.  But there are some sites that literally tell brides that they don't need a wedding planner because they are.  I take intense offense to this.

I got my start in the business as an on site manager, I absolutely know what the job entails.  They work very hard, managing the site and the staff on site.  But they are not wedding planners.  They work for the venue, not you the bride.  (It would be a total conflict of interests to be hired by the venue to run the venue AND be hired by the bride and groom as a planner.) Their responsibilities include making sure that nothing goes wrong with the venue and the venue's staff.  They are going to be there for you if you want to see the site and if you have any questions about the site between 9 - 5.  They can also be helpful in vendor referrals.  On your wedding day they are there to open the site, make sure it is set up correctly, bathrooms are stocked, and remain on site in case you need anything.  Some site managers I work with have an office that they are at during the event.

A wedding planner is in charge of EVERYTHING.  The wedding, flow of the day and making sure every little aspect is organized.  They are usually available to you more than just 9 - 5.  I at least am.  My brides have my home and cell phone numbers and may call me any time of the day or night.  As a planner, I help with the design, look and feel of the wedding.  Most of my clients hire me a year out and we spend an extreme amount of time together.  I attend every meeting, fitting and shopping trip, I know absolutely every detail about the wedding.  I get to know who the family members and key players are.  I run the rehearsal and most times am invited to the rehearsal dinner.  Family members get to know me and trust me, this helps so much the next day.  My job doesn't stop after the wedding day.  There is usually many things I do the week after a wedding.  Making sure all of the rentals were returned, dealing with claims of damage to rental items, returning personal items to the bride and groom, and possibly planning Sunday brunches.  I literally spend 100 hours on an average wedding.

I have heard from quite a few brides that particular venues in my area intimate to them that they can go without a wedding planner because they have them.  This is a gross misleading.  I have no idea why some venues would not want to work with wedding planners.  I basically think it's because they have had a bad experience with a wedding planner or they like to think themselves the planner.  You're not.  Working at a beautiful venue doesn't a wedding planner make.  Planners get a bad rap.  I've even lost a job to a photographer who convinced the bride that they would be the planner.  How odd is that?  I would never say I could plan, coordinate AND photograph your wedding.  Also last time I checked, owning a camera does not make you a wedding planner.  I mean you need a clipboard too.  ;-)
(I should also say that there are many venues I work at that know the value of having a wedding planner and require their brides to hire one.  I love those venues.)

Advice:

For On Site Managers:  If the bride and groom hire a wedding planner, please let them do their job.  Don't undermine them in front of your clients.  I've actually had to nicely ask a site manager to leave a meeting she tagged along on because she kept contradicting everything I said and was offering bad advice.  (She was a recent bride and was apparently all knowing.)  That's not being helpful.  The bride and groom have researched and picked their planner for a reason.  When a couple hires me, it's because of ME and what I bring to the table.  Don't butt in and try to take control.  I had a site manager, thinking I was behind schedule, tell the caterer to push dinner back.  He listened to her because he works at the site so much.  Well, I wasn't behind schedule and when I went to check with the caterer about serving dinner, he informed me that he had been told to push it back.  I was livid!  Truth be told, there are a few sites I get hired at mostly because the bride doesn't want the on site manager near her wedding.  Case in point.

Don't be so ridged.  One of my biggest complaints is when a site manager doesn't let us change up their typical set up.  Sarah Angelique does not do cookie cutter weddings!!  ;-)  Why do you care if we want the chairs a little different, or the aisle wider?  I know you always do round tables, why do you care if we do square?  I hate hearing "we always do this or that."

Don't feel offended when your clients hire a wedding planner.  This is no slight to you.  They simply understand the value of a wedding planner.  A planner should make your job easier.  Without one, you could be expected to step in much more than you are paid to.

Any questions?  Did I leave something out?  Let me know, I love to hear from the people reading my blog.

Broken Engagement ~ Do You Return the Ring?

Yesterday on my facebook page, I asked for thoughts on weather or not an engagement ring should be returned after a broken engagement.  I received such a huge response that I had to blog about it.

People seem to be spilt on this issue.  Half feeling that you should return the ring and the other half say you can keep it.  Well the law says that state law dictates who gets to keep the ring.

In Montana an engagement ring is considered an unconditional gift and therefore does not need to be returned.  In California, if the woman breaks off the engagement, she has to return the ring.  If the man breaks it off, she can keep it.  Most states say that the ring is conditional of the wedding.  No wedding, no ring.

Many people felt that keeping the ring would, in technical terms, be icky.  ;-)  I tend to agree.  You wouldn't get 1/2 the price if you tried to sell it.  So what would you do with it?  What do you tell the man you eventually marry?

Advice to men:  Sadly, if you use a family heirloom as an engagement ring, you do stand to lose it.  A prenuptial agreement can protect your family heirloom in the event of a broken engagement.

The biggest question... who gets custody of the wedding planner?  ;-)

The Guestzilla ~ Part 2: The Drunk Guest

People, your friend's wedding is not your chance to get drunk as a skunk and act a fool.  I've never understood why people feel the need to drink so much at weddings.  Nothing good has ever come from too much alcohol.  Let me tell you about what happens with too much alcohol.  Girls trip in their heels, men fight with their friends, and parents embarrass their children.  I love when my clients tell me that they're sure their guests won't get drunk on just beer and wine.  I once had the cutest, petite lady falling down, quite literally, drunk by 7:00.  Simply from wine.  Then there were the parents that once the baby was asleep in the stroller, went a little crazy.  To the point where I looked over in time to catch the wife sitting on top of a table, falling backwards into a very large centerpiece, spilling candles and water everywhere.  I of course was there in an instant cleaning if up before a fire started or worse, the bride saw it.  ;-)  Assuring the woman that no one saw and that it happens all the time.  It doesn't.  Drunk guests start complaining about everything.  The music, where the heaters are placed, the fact that the party is ending.  They start requesting ridiculous songs and then get mad at the DJ when they don't play them.  Drunk family members are the best!  I once had a grandmother giving a most touching toast to the bride and groom.  And then... at the end of her toast she said, referring to the older and unmarried brother, "Don't worry, you'll get married soon.  Someone is out there for you."  It was mortifying.

The absolute worst thing I have ever witnessed, I am proud to say, DID NOT happen at one of my weddings.  I was helping a caterer friend of mine at a wedding manage his staff.  It was the end of the night, he had gone home and it was myself and 2 wait staff.  All of a sudden one of the wait staff came up to me and said:  "They're fighting at the bar."  I thought he was joking.  Well I should have known we were headed for disaster, the wait staff had been clearing stacks of shot glasses.  Yes, the wedding planner had allowed a full open bar for over 6 hours.  I say 'allowed,' because I would NEVER do that.  If a client of mine insisted on that much alcohol, I would walk.  I don't want my name associated with what could happen.  This is your wedding, but it's my business and my reputation.  This wedding ended with the police, a fire truck, ambulance, the bride in tears, her mother screaming and the venue owner bloodied and in the hospital.  Later, myself and the wait staff even had to give our story to the police.

Some Advice:

Brides, Grooms and Guests:  Eat plenty that day.  Especially breads and anything that absorbs alcohol.  Drink plenty of water!!!  Most of my weddings are outside in high heat.  I cannot stress the importance of water.

Guests:  Give yourself a 2 or 3 drink maximum.  You'll thank yourself later when you see the wedding photos or video.  Save it for the after party.  You can let loose at the bar after the wedding.

Brides and Grooms:  Don't feel the need to supply your guests with an endless amount of alcohol for the entire night.  I would never have a full hosted bar for the entire night.  Host a cocktail hour or two and then switch to beer and wine.  People drink slower on their dime.  Always have shuttles or taxis available, someone will need them.  And the best advice for brides and grooms, don't drink too much on your wedding day.  You want to enjoy your wedding night, don't you?

The Guestzilla ~ Part 1: The Omniscient Guest

I've heard a lot of people, mainly in the TV industry, refer to some brides as 'bridezillas.'  There's even an entire show dedicated to it.  I for one, in 9 years,  have never crossed paths with a bridezilla.  I have met many other 'zillas' in my day and will try to blog about them all.  I have decided to start with... "The Guestzilla."  Da da da!  In my experience, it takes one bad guest to cause a scene or dampen your wedding day.  What's the expression?  "One bad apple..."  So true.   I have so many great experiences with guestzillas that I've decided to make this a multi part post.

We'll start with:  "The Omniscient Guest."  This is the guest who knows so much more than anyone else at the wedding, including all of the wedding professionals.  Everything you're about to read has happen to me at one of my weddings.  ;-)

Guests, let me assure you that EVERY detail at a wedding has a purpose and has been thought out.  Some advice, please don't switch seats at dinner when we've gone to the trouble to assign you a seat.  That cute little card with your name on it, please don't put it in your purse until after the meal.  Wonder why your name is in one color and your husband's in another?  It denotes your entrée choice.  If you start moving things around it affects the flow of dinner.  The bride and groom have taken so much time and put a ton of thought in to where you are sitting at their wedding.  It's just for an hour.  Be an adult, and sit where you are told.

No, you cannot move the tables with the 50 pound centerpieces closer together to make one big table.  I had a wedding where to my horror I had guests trying to do just this.  Really?  You can't sit 8 feet away from your friends?  It's just for dinner!

Never try to grab a microphone out of the hand of the DJ or Wedding Planner.  We're not going to hand over the mic to a drunk person.  Or a sober person for that matter.  Let the MC make the announcements.

Don't interrupt the wedding planner during a most busy time and ask for explanations as to why this or that is happening.  What am I supposed to say?  We don't have a coffee station because your friends didn't spring for it, or think it necessary in the 90 degree heat?  She's not dancing with her father because he's estranged and was lucky to have even been invited?  There's no alcohol because the groom is an alcoholic?  Let it be.  Just be happy and have a good time.

Lastly, please don't tell me what you did at your wedding, your friend's wedding or your sister's wedding.  To be blunt, I don't care.  This isn't your wedding and we're doing it the bride's way.  Not to mention, I have one or two weddings under my belt, this isn't my first rodeo.  ;-)

Stay tuned for Part 2 of my Guestzilla series "The Drunk Guest."

Ask A Planner: Family Feud

Hello Wed Heads!  Today's question comes from a high school friend of mine, Danielle.  She wants to know how I deal with feuding family members at weddings.

You would think that people would put aside their differences for their loved one's special day, but no.  I recently had a horrible, estranged mother of the groom call the grandmother (who raised the groom) a b***h!  At the wedding!  She couldn't keep it together for one night.  I of course also have had the:  "I won't sit next to him, I won't take a picture with her."  I say get over it people!  We are adults, please act like it.  All in all most of the family members at my weddings are very gracious and try to avoid all drama.  As a planner, I PLAN for it as well.

During the year before their wedding, the couple and I will create a detailed 'family tree' if you will, that only I see.  It shows me who is divorced, remarried, which family members aren't speaking, who won't sit together, who won't pose in pictures with this person, etc...  The couple and I go over this very carefully during the planning of the wedding.  This helps me so much.  It avoids me asking estranged parents to walk down the aisle or pose for a picture together.  Speaking of which, family photographs can be a touchy time for feuding family members.  I avoid hurt feelings by having a list of photo groupings so no one is ever left out or asked to do something they aren't comfortable with.  This is one of the reasons photographers love me!  They have enough on their plates without worrying about family drama.  I deal with the drama so they can 'focus' on creating beautiful photographs.  (Sorry for the pun.)  ;-)

My advice if you are a feuding family member:  Please don't wait until the wedding day to talk to the bride and groom about your concerns.  If you don't want to take pictures or sit with someone else, please tell them during the year of their wedding planning.  DON'T wait until the happy day.  They will appreciate being able to deal with it ahead of time.  All that being said, only immediate family members should ever make such a request.

My advice for brides and grooms with feuding family members:  Don't think they will behave at your wedding.  Expect the worst and deal with it ahead of time.  Ask your divorced parents if they are comfortable taking pictures together, or sitting together.  Talk with your wedding planner and let her know about any drama there is.  Let your photographer know the groupings you want and tell them not to deviate from the list.  Plan ahead, you won't be sorry.

Ask A Planner

I asked for wedding/event related questions on my facebook page, and my fans didn't disappoint.

Nicky wanted to know about bridal shops in Santa Barbara County.  First, I wouldn't limit myself to the county you are in.  You are so close to LA and San Francisco, do some research and maybe plan a little trip to do some shopping.  As far as Santa Barbara goes, I've got a great tip for you Nicky.  A dear friend of mine, Mercedes Trump, owns Beautiful Boutique at 2009 Chapala Street in Santa Barbara.  Mercedes is nationally known for her expertise on wedding gowns.  She will be a wealth of information, I would stumble in to her boutique.  (They are closed Sunday and Monday.)  And a little side note, I am proud to say that I am named after her beautiful daughter, Angelique.  ;-)


Next Janie Skelton, who manages the Grand Chenier Ranch in San Miguel asked why so many brides think it will be okay to simply appoint a friend or relative as wedding planner.  Well I'm so glad you asked Janie.  ;-)  Anyone who thinks they can simply plan and execute a wedding NEVER has.  There is a reason myself and many other people are able to make this a full time job.  Not to mention the experience a wedding planner has.  Do you think my weddings when I first started out are in the same league as they are now?  No way!  I've grown, I've learned, and most importantly I've experienced.  I know what to do when confronted with any issue, I know how to deal with other vendors and anticipate their needs, I know the laws and regulations, I know how guests would like to be treated at an event, I know how to put on and throw amazing successful weddings and events, because I have done so for the past 9 years.  What about contacts?  Does your family member/friend have the owner of the rental company's cell phone number.  Do they know every DJ in the county so that when the horrible DJ the bride insisted on hiring doesn't have the right equipment they can call someone to bail them out?  Most importantly, does your family member/friend have the experience that a professional would.  No they don't.  The venue is the one who usually suffers in this scenario.  An inexperienced wedding planner could be more trouble than not having one at all.  Even if you have a capable family member/friend (I of course have planned a friend's wedding) do you want to do that to your family member/friend?  That person isn't going to get to celebrate with you because they will be working like crazy. Whenever I hear a bride say their mom or best friend is their 'wedding planner,' I always say:  "Why, do you hate them?"

And finally, Dustin wanted to know how much champagne a bride and groom should typically buy for their wedding.  Great question Dustin!  First, are you serving champagne for the toasts only, or do you plan on serving it all night?  Most couples opt to only serve it during the toasts, so if that is the case I usually recommend 1 bottle per table of 8 people.  Keeping in mind that you just pour a half a glass or so for the toasts.  People seem to be happy with this.  Of course, have a few bottles extra and have experienced wait staff pouring the glasses.  They will know how much to pour to make the bottle go around the table.  If you want to be able to really supply your guests with champagne then account for 1.5 bottles per table of 8 or 2 glasses per guest.

Great questions everyone!  I hope I was helpful, thanks and keep them coming!

Etiquette, Schemtiquette?

Yesterday on facebook I asked if anyone had any etiquette questions for me.  I received a great response.  Here are the answers.

Analese wanted to know: Should you send the wedding gift before or after the wedding?  Or do you bring it with you?  Great question Analese.  Gone are the days of getting married at church and having cake and punch in the courtyard.  With more and more couples having both destination and local destination weddings (weddings within driving distance of the couple's hometown) it just makes sense to send the gift before or after.  Why travel with an expensive gift, only to have the couple lug it back?  Even if you do get married right down the street in your town, it is a lot to load up all of the presents and transport them home.  In my opinion, couples will appreciate the convenience of arriving home to all of their gifts.  All that being said, if you do bring a gift to the wedding, bring it to the reception, not the ceremony.  They will just have to then transport the gifts from the ceremony venue to the reception venue.  And for goodness sake, TAPE THE CARD ON WELL!  You would not believe how many people slip a card under a ribbon knowing that the gifts will have to travel a long distance.  I hope that answers your question Analese!

Nicky wanted to know:  Do you wear your engagement ring when walking down the aisle?  Well, yes and no.  It is absolutely acceptable to wear your engagement ring during the ceremony.  Although the wedding ring is worn 'closest to the heart.'  So you would have to take off your engagement ring to let your husband place your wedding ring on your finger.  A great option is to wear your engagement ring on your right hand and then after the ceremony place it in it's proper place on top of your wedding ring.  A lot of ring sets these days are bonded together, perhaps before the ceremony.  That is what I ended up doing.  I didn't want to deal with having two separate rings that I might lose on the honeymoon, so a week before the wedding I had the two rings bonded together.  I then just didn't wear my engagement ring that last week.  As a wedding planner, my rule is, 'There are no rules!'  This is your wedding and you do whatever you want.  If you want to wear your ring, simply take it off and hand it to your maid of honor, or officiant before the ring ceremony.

And finally, a new bride of mine, Lindsay, pointed out that there are just too many rules when it comes to planning a wedding.  Even down to which mother gets to buy her dress first.  Well Lindsay, why do you think there are wedding planners?  ;-)  There is a ton to know and stay on top of.  Feelings get hurt at weddings ALL the time.  I've had bridesmaids in tears because of their placement in the lineup.  As for which mother gets to shop first, that is an easy one.  Tradition is that the bride's parents pay for the wedding, so of course the mother of the bride would get to choose first what to wear to her party that she is hosting.  (I could also see this 'rule' being set back in the day when there was one store in town.)  ;-)  It reminds me of one of the funniest stories I've heard since I've been in the wedding business.  A woman was getting married, her parents were divorced and her father had remarried.  Coincidentally the bride's mother and step-mother bought the same dress to wear to the wedding.  The bride tried to appeal to the step-mother to change her outfit, but she wouldn't budge.  So what did the mother of the bride do? She wore the dress to the rehearsal dinner!  lol!!!


Emily Post has been and will probably remain the authority on all things etiquette.  She has an entire book written on the subject of wedding etiquette available here.

Thanks for the questions everyone, keep them coming, I'm always here for answers.  Don't want to post your question on facebook?  Email me at:  sarah@sarahangelique.com

Dinner at Embassy Suites, San Luis Obispo

A few days ago on facebook I won dinner for my family from Embassy Suites in San Luis Obispo.  I get totally excited about winning anything, so I was very stoked about dinner for 3!  Embassy Suites is opening up their new restaurant, Greenhouse Grill and Café and were looking for people to try out their new menu.  We got there at 7:50 and the place was packed!  Great first night.  I've always liked the inside of the Embassy Suites Hotel.  There is a large glass roof that allows you to see the night sky.  Guests come and go which is perfect for people watching.  The restaurant's placement has not changed, but the menu has had a full facelift.  Our server, Greer - who was a cutie, welcomed us and explained that this was a trial run for the restaurant.  Well you would never know it.  Everything ran like a well oiled machine.

I started my meal with the Baby Spinach Salad, with caramelized onions, imported bleu cheese, oven dried prosciutto, hard boiled egg and lemon vinaigrette.  Yum!  

(please forgive the poor quality of my photos.  They were taken with my iPhone under the romantic lighting of the restaurant)

I may have ordered everything based on cheese.  You know me.     ;-)  My entrée was blue cheese crusted filet mignon with port wine demi glace.  Garlic roasted asparagus and mashed potatoes. 

Yes, I still had room for dessert.  I couldn't pass up chocolate bundt cake with raspberry sauce and whipped cream.

Everything was very good!  Jason and Gabriel loved their meals and a good time was had by all.  

Thanks to Embassy Suites for a great evening!  Can't wait to come back.

It's The Little Things

As a wedding planner, you never know what request will come your way or what you may need to do last minute.  At a recent wedding the bride said to me, "I need to borrow something."  "What?" I asked.  "No, I need something 'borrowed.'"  Ah!  Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.  I happened to be wearing a very dear necklace to me that day.  It has my son's name, birthday and birthstone on it.  So I took it off and I attached it to her bouquet.  I love my job and love being a part of such a special day.  Photo by Lindsey Hahn Photography.  Bride's bouquet by panacea, event floral design.

It's All About The Groom

I've noticed a trend in the past few years.  The days of men saying:  "just tell me where and when to show up" are gone. There are a few reasons this seems to happens.  Lately I've had more and more brides in demanding, fast paced careers.  Their grooms seem to have more time than they do, and so become my partner in crime during the planning process.  They take on favor decisions, color schemes, cake choices, everything.  Then there is the groom who is just totally into it.  He wants to be involved in every detail.  I had a groom insist that we email every day for the year before his wedding.  Honestly, even I don't have that much to say.  ;-) And then there is the groom that makes all the other grooms look bad.  This wonderful man had been married to his bride for 10 years and wanted to surprise her for their 10th anniversary.  He arranged for their closest friends and family to join them for an intimate vow renewal.  (Blog on that event coming soon.)  Which are you?  The go with the flow groom?  The overly involved groom?  The totally romantic groom?  I, for one, am all for men becoming more involved with the planning process.  Come on ladies, it's their day too.

Caroline & Curt ~ Vineyard Wedding ~ Paso Robles, CA

This was one of my favorite weddings of 2009.

I not only coordinated the wedding, but arranged all of the flowers.

The bride's bouquet was adorned with her grandmother's brooch.

I love adding little touches anywhere I can at a wedding.

These are nosegays for the mothers.  I had the bride make necklaces with baby photos of herself and the groom.  The moms loved this gift. As all the flowers are lavender, they will dry nicely and be lifelong keepsakes.

There was quite a bit of detail in the 'tablescape.'  My favorite part was the mini grape vines.  I found them locally of course.  The perfect touch for a wedding at a winery in Paso Robles.

The bride and groom were married under the trees with the sweet smell of lavender in the air and their closest friends and family surrounding them.  Literally.  As soon as the bride took her place next to her groom all of the guests moved in around them like a hug.  It was very intimate.

Amazing photos like these can only be taken in beautiful Paso Robles.  The bride and groom took full advantage of the vineyards and spent some time taking photos among the vines.

Dorian Michael serenaded guests with his amazing guitar stylings. Want him to play at your wedding?  Give me a call, he only works for me.  ;-)

A wonderful evening under the trees at Carmody McKnight Winery. With about 50 guests, it was the perfect number to have a large continuous table.

The mother of the bride made the fun, crafty 'Just Married' banner.  It was so cute I had to hang it from the head table.  Later I made sure it made it into their car for the honeymoon.

Thank you Jon Nickson for these amazing images.  It was a pleasure working with you. And thank you Caroline & Curt for being wonderful clients to work for, love you guys!!

Wedding & Reception Venue:  Carmody McKnight Winery

Photographer:  Jon Nickson

Florist:  Sarah Angelique

Caterer:  Miss Oddette

Music:  Dorian Michael